Swansea City v West Ham United, PL, Match preview

I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles

We Football fans are used to the term "Bubble Match". It's used where, when we play our Far Eastern rivals from the Splott Peninsula, or Adge Cutler and the Wurzels from further East along the Intercontinental Highway (the M4), we're condemned to ride the Magic Bus trail like Welsh Beef being shipped to the Continental Slaughter House, before being made to strut our stuff on the way into their hallowed Stadia in front of a cacophony of cute local jesters (sic).

This Saturday, contrastingly, we've a fixture against a Club that has adopted the iconic " I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles " as it's song of recognition, with far more pleasing connotations.

We come to this game against West Ham United, a Club long revered for the style of their football (much as we are now), on the back of last Saturday's pulsating 5-0 drubbing of QPR, and the Hammers too won their first fixture 1-0 against the Villa, so both teams will be keen to continue the good work.

That reputation for pleasing pure football from WHU has, in the last couple of seasons, begun to come into question, with a large proportion of their own fans voicing their disquiet at the perceived long-ball tactics employed by the current Manager, Big Sam Allardyce, he of contrasting pasts and presents, even.

Listen on - hey - Sam doesn't do "Irony" or "Self Deprecation" even - and one of his most memorable quotes concerned his surprising (in his eyes) failure to be offered one of the really "BIG" jobs in the game and is a corker.

His suggestion that  " I would like to think the next manager is English. And the public seem to demand that at the moment." when passed up for the England gig included the memorable rider that if he'd been called Allardice rather than Allardyce he'd have a better chance of managing Real Madrid.

No, I didn't just make that up, check it out.

Big Sam is a man of stark contrasts. Rightly lauded in his earlier and current managerial career for an innovative and technical, sports science approach to modern football (started in his  Bolton days), he retains an ability to annoy his own fans for his antediluvian, almost Neanderthal approach to battering teams from direct football - just ask some Newcastle Utd fans and a large proportion of the current Hammers faithful.

Truly, a Charles Hughes for the modern age , much given to to talk of POMO (position of maximum opportunity) - known in many circles as LOLAQ ( Lump it long and Quick).

This is West Ham's first season back in the Premiership after a disastrous relegation under the funereal Avram Grant some 2 years ago, so Allardyce has at least achieved the brief demanded by the Clubs recently ensconced owners, the Adult Publishing and Adult Apparel chain Impesarios David Sullivan and David Gold ( think Razzle, Big 'Uns and Ann Summers), who, prior to their purchase of the controlling interest in WHU some 2 years ago had been in charge at Birmingham. The organisation also includes SurAlan's redoubtable henchwoman Karen Brady, Mrs. Paul Peschisolido, as Vice Chairperson.

The renaissance at the Club also currently involves the fate of the Olympic Stadium, since it is the Hammers' Board's wish to be considered the preferred long term tenants, although Tottenham Hotspur and Leyton Orient are ensuring that this is a story that has at least a couple of years to run.

So, with this fizz-bang-pop background, what of the team we can expect at the Lib this weekend.

This is the current squad................

2 Winston Reid DEF, 3 George McCartney DEF, 4 Kevin Nolan MF, 5 James Tomkins DEF, 8 Nicky Maynard STR, 9 Carlton Cole STR, 10 Jack Collison MF, 11 Modibo Maiga STR, 12 Ricardo Vaz Te STR, 13 Stephen Henderson GK, 14 Matthew Taylor MF, 16 Mark Noble MF, 17 Joey O'Brien DEF, 19 James Collins DEF, 20 Guy Demel DEF, 21 Mohamed Diame MF, 22  Jussi Jaaskelainen GK, 23 Alou Diarra MF, 23 Ravel Morrison (on loan to Birmghm ) MF, 27 Jordan Spence DEF, 32 Gary O'Neil MF, 43 Callum Driver DEF.

Last week the team lined up v Villa with Jaaskelainen in goal, Demel, Reid, Collins and McCartney at the back,  Diame protecting, with Noble, Nolan and Taylor supporting a front 2 of Carlton Cole and Ricardo Vaz Te.

A putative 4-1-3-2 with the capacity to go 4-4-2 and others at will and circmstance. Whilst Villa had the bulk of possession, Allardyce's troops were cute, and effective.

Jussi Jaaskelainen has replaced Rob Green in goal, and the QPR man gave us Swans evidence last Saturday which is the better keeper, and Big Sam had Jussi for years at Bolton, and he's always been one of the PL's best keepers.

Guy Demel and George McCartney played as advancing FB's, but given Villa's possession, were somewhat limited. I've a feeling one or the other of our wingers could have a feast day if they're not on their game throughout.

The NZ International CB Winston Reid is getting better by the game. He was raw last year, but seems to be settling in well, and they have the classy James Tomkins (if a little error prone) in consideration too.

The other CB was our old friend James Collins, who returned to the Club from Villa, and I have to admit to "not quite getting him" in the pantheon of decent players. I've always thought him limited, but that may be my prejudice.

Ah well, we'll get to see, since Danny Graham's performance last week leading the line was exemplary, and DG will surely test him.

Maohamed Diame, the holding MF'er came from Wigan, and is a grafting presence who can shoot, too.

Mark Noble, the long term internally developed Hammer, and Matty Taylor, the ex Portsmouth etc player pushed wider, with the funky chicken Kevin Nolan supporting the strikers.

Noble is a player who represents the heart of this proud London Club - came through their famed Academy to graduate to a fully fledged top flight player. Taylor retains the ability to perform key actions in games, especially when you think him ineffective, and has a fierce shot and dead ball expertise.

Whatever I think of Kevin Nolan will be forever linked to his visit to the Liberty as skipper of Newcastle a couple of seasons ago, when he was carrying some timber - he looked broader than he was tall - a sort of Yakubu of the M/Field. He remains, I'll admit, an admirable snaffler of goals and many from half chances. It's just that bloody chicken strut he does when he scores- I'll ALWAYS hate that.

Up front, the perennially disappointing Carlton Cole seems always to be one smidgeon away from being a truly top class striker- physically imposing, technically good, and yet...............

Am I being unfair? - I dare say Hammers fans would say Yes, but I can't help feeling that maybe he ought to have been even better than he is. That's the pompous thing about being a fan - we proffer these opinions when the people we judge/rate are so much better than we ever were or could hope to have been. Ah well, it was ever thus.

He was partnered last week by the familiar Ricardo Vaz Te, another Big Sam reclaimee from his Bolton days, and we will face more difficult opponents, but few more lively.

Looking at the rest of their squad there are a few points to be made.

It appears that they're close to signing the fine winger Matt Jarvis from Wolves, but excuse me if I think £10m (as reported) is overpaying, particularly when you compare it to a putative £5m for SS to Man City : maybe £6m for Pablo Hernandez from Valencia in his stead : and then there's Man City's Adam Johnson, who MUST be worth a more equitable fee than I'm seeing reported.

For the record, I think that's double what Jarvis is worth, the SS and PH fees seem fair, and Johnson should be the priciest in this equation. Still, that's just my opinion, since that's what I'm here to do.

They are backed up by the players listed above, and perhaps later in the season we'll get to concentrate on some of them, but the ones who catch my eye now are the striker Nicky Maynard, signed from Brizzle City and a regular scorer, the classy Midfielder Gary O'Neil, and the recent import Modibo Maiga, who, reports suggest, is a pacey striker cum winger from Mali.

With regard to our own side, after the cracking impetus of last week's result at Loftus Rd, I wouldn't dare suggest that we'd go with anything other than what ML deems acceptable. As I write this on Thursday, it appears that Ki Sung-Yueng is due for a medical with us tomorrow (Friday) and that the Pablo Hernandez deal is still alive.

Couple that with the far seeing arrivals of Kyle Bartley and Jamie Proctor and we can see that we're moving on the right lines.

'Doncha just LOVE being a Swan? I do.

Onward, Swansea City.